Where Did We Go Wrong?

Readers Beware: for those of you who prefer my light-hearted, sarcastic posts, this is not one. This post falls more on the "Heal the World" end of the spectrum. (And it's a long one)

I never get sick of this video! Not just because it's unbelievable and hilarious, but mostly for the point that it illustrates so well, a point that I will be addressing in this post. How did society (and public education) fail such a beautiful girl? Where is the missing link? Well, of course, I have a theory. A theory that might seem controversial... But hey, it's my blog, right? :) 

Somewhere along the line, we as an American society began to drastically lose sight of what is really important. Of course this has happened in many parts of life. But the strand of this disease that I think applies to beautiful little darlings like the one in the video, I call Beauty Blindness. I make no attempt to place blame for the epidemic of Beauty Blindness. It is a complex problem that has developed over the course of time. Thanks to media, and... well mainly media... and the voice of the evil one, the pure, traditional definition of BEAUTY that Mr. Webster himself probably had a hand in declaring has been corrupted. Beauty is now judged  on how our outward appearances compare to media's definition of beauty. We are now encouraged to prove our beauty with our outward, physical traits (lucky us). Very few people take the time to appreciate and credit the inner beauty that each human being naturally possesses. And let's be honest, VERY few people possess a natural outer beauty.... trust me, I battle this fact each morning! So it may seem that I've developed my ideas about Beauty Blindness because I feel inferior to society's definition of beauty. I guess that's partially true, who doesn't? My ideas on this subject and the reasons that I write this post stem from my everyday observations at how this problem plagues so many people that I know and love... most of which are women.

We read in the scriptures and the words of our modern day prophets that women have sacred and special responsibilities. We have specific and defined roles in building the kingdom of God. We are blessed with tender hearts that allow us to easily connect with just about any living thing on this earth. We are part of the largest women's organization in America. We have a place and a role in this world that is unique to each of us. How do we forget this and allow ourselves to fall into the trap of measuring our value by how we look, live, and act according to the world's standard? And for that matter, why are so many "good" women so critical of one another's appearances. Over the years I have had friends say things to me like: "I'm not as big as she is, am I?" "Why would she wear that shirt?" "If she can go out in a swim suit, anyone can." "She would never have a chance with him, she is not cute at all." There are times when I get caught up in the backbiting. But mostly it just makes me sad. We're all here for the same reason, we should all be invested in the same cause.

I recently went to an event where there were 10 or so girls that I went to high school with. All of the girls but 3 of us were married and have given birth to children. I walked in late, feeling nervous to see many people I hadn't seen in years. I entered and turned to a statue in the middle of the room as I felt 10 pairs of eyes watching my every move. I scoped out every girl there in a matter of nanoseconds. I felt my heart drop as I made the realization that I was by far the largest girl there... and I am not large! I am just normal!! In their defense, a couple of the girls have always been small and always will be- they're just built that way. But they were also all tan and all sorts of done-up. I felt my self-esteem drop 20 points and I left as fast as I could. I feel frustrated with myself that I let it bother me so much. I know better than to care about something so frivolous. But it fed the fire of things I had already been wondering... Why are so many moms today working so hard to live up to society's standards? This is a trend that I am seeing everywhere! It seems to be especially bad in Utah ( it pains me to admit that). Why?! Why are we forgetting? Why are we letting the judgments of the world override the importance of our duties as women,mothers, and friends?!  And equally as important, why aren't we putting that much effort into developing our talents, traits, qualities, friendships, callings, and minds? Case and Point: Miss South Carolina.

I once did a Cinderella birthday party for a stranger. I was easily, the biggest person there, again.  All of the beautiful, freakishly thin moms had joined the party only to leave me alone with the girls for two hours while they sat in the other room bragging about how they can't eat a cupcake because they'll have to run 2 more miles to burn off the calories if they did and "complaining" about the cost of their latest purchases. I wanted to slit my wrists. I was certain my IQ score had dropped many points just by overhearing the conversation.

TV, movies, magazines, etc. are all beginning to portray women as mindless beings who are only worth attention if they are "beautiful." I'd just like to give a shout out to girls like Paris, Lindsay, Jessica, Britney, Miley, and so on who have done nothing but hurt our cause. Luckily we know better. We are very blessed to have the whole picture.... with great privilege comes great responsibility. So here's to the hope and commitment that I will never become "that" mom or "that" girl. And if I do, please take me out of my misery!!